No matter how much money I save or how well I keep to my budget. I have a money weakness. One that makes me want to throw my budget out the window and spend, spend, spend. My money weakness is my children. I love to spoil my kids!
I think no other purchase is nearly as emotionally charged as what we buy for our children. When they are small, we want to get them that toy that makes their face light up even though we know they have plenty of toys sitting at home. As they get older, we begin to see the purchases as a way to help them fit in. There is nothing like looking into your teen's face when you buy them that shirt everyone is wearing. We want our kids to be happy. Even though it is fleeting, it feels like the purchase is doing just that and the instant gratification can be addictive.
My children are growing up in an area where many teens have nicer phones, purses and cars than most adults. My daughter is very level headed and she is not the type of kid to wants every designer label under the sun, but yet I still want to buy everything for her. I want to give her whatever her heart desires even though she rarely asks for anything and I know that spoiling her that way will change who she is.
Even though I want my children to be happy, I know true happiness does not come from a pair of designer jeans. I want them to grow up to be the kind of adult I would want to spend time with and spoiling them will have the opposite outcome.
Finding the balance is where I struggle. I strive to buy them some of the things they want while still staying within my budget. But even if money were no object, it is still important to say no sometimes. It doesn't feel as good in the moment, but we are growing people here and spoiling them gives them a skewed view of the world and a sense of self entitlement. If making them happy really is the driving force behind the desire to buy them everything under the sun, then teaching them to how to deal with a little disappointment will make them happier in the long run.
I know this is something I will always struggle with as a mom and likely as a grandparent too, but I think as long as I keep the end goal in mind I can keep it in check.
Do you struggle with the desire to buy too much for your children? How do you find the right balance?
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